Find Out Who You Are and Do It On Purpose

Imagine this for while. You are employed, student, parent or member of some group. What is your goal? Of course make money, pass exams, take care about kids, and succeed. But we are forgetting something. We forget who we are, why we do what we do, we are not being self-aware. Think of you that people would appreciate you like a person more, they would like being in your presence. Would you like it? Key is self-awareness. I was given opportunity to better understand myself and most likely others. Picture, how does self-awareness of yourself can benefit you and others? I am sure you get it.


There is huge difference being or not being self aware. E.g. When I worked and was trying to show my prospects why my service is better than what they have, what often happened was that I was getting: No, I am not interested in, I am happy what I have, I do not need, I am good…you know what does it mean, right? All those answers create emotions which make how I feel. You might think in your mind that all is ok, but what is the reality? In your subconscious you are influenced, which means you let others influence you. And message you want to distribute will be colored with emotions you will share subconsciously. Because more important is how we present rather than what we present. You do not deliver what you want to.

Being self aware means difference. Most of the people would continue working thinking that everything is all right, but is it? When you become self aware, you understand what is going on. You see problem popping out. You realize that if you let it go further, it will have impact on you and people you communicate with.

So think about how do you usually handle critic situation in your life?

If you can be aware of your own emotions, you can improve your effectiveness a lot. How?

• Putting people at ease
• Creating  balance between work and personal life
• Being straightforward
• Building and maintaining relationship
• Confronting problems  

Now I better understand myself which gives me power to understand and better communicate with others.  And I am sure you would agree that the most important factor of every relationship (with family, business partners, and friends) is communication.

So what do you think, how you can become more self aware and perceive your own emotions?
What helps me is this: 

1. Always check how you feel (write down your own emotions)  
2. Identify source/ is there a reason to keep those emotions
3. Replace negative emotions with possitive (desire, faith, hope, enthusiasm, love) 
4. Communicate appropriate message

Self awareness is pivot to leadership and it is crucial how to handle stress situations. The more accurate you can identify you emotional upsets, faster you can recover and represent who you are. The self awareness can be developed through practice. You can practice every day, use opportunities to self reflect on adversity you meet every day.
To sum up, ability to demonstrate you as a cooperative, contributing and self aware member of society is critical for long term success.  

 Do you want to become person who will contribute to society and influence others? You tell me…  

  

How Goals Can Reduce Your Effectiveness

Many people feel nowadays that they work hard however they cannot achieve what they want. Either there is a problem that they do not have any goals or they have. Setting up goals is important activity which help you pick direction you want to go and for motivating yourself to turn your vision of future into reality.

I agree with that it is important to set up goals and work toward them, because you need clear vision why you want to achieve your goal.

However there is one downsize. Once you stay focused only on your goal, you spoil your experience of activity you will need to pursue. It makes you more to drop out earlier because most likely you will not hit your expectations so soon and you will feel like goal you were set up is beyond your limits.

My experience is same. When I started my internship experience, I was acquainted with concept of goals and so. However I made big mistake right from beginning. I set up goals and I was putting all my effort only toward to goal. I was taking all that too serious. And every day with unmet expectation I created within myself more pressure and discomfort. Harder I have worked and focused on goal, it was becoming more difficult for me. And of course I have lost pleasure from what I have been doing. And believe me once you lose pleasure from what you do, it is time for change. Never let any negative experience drag you down. You have to feel satisfaction in what you do and after that goals and success become your reality.

There is only one way how to overcome. You have to lose concern about goals and go out just with clear mind, reminding that you will enjoy day, it means focus more on experience of activity without any doubts for quotas, goals and your results get better. I realized what I needed to do and when you become more free minded, you become enjoying more what you do, goals you were set up initially will be achievable.

What I have discovered is that, staying focused on goals detracts from inherent pleasure of the activities you need to pursue to achieve your goals. There is a lot of information between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. It means that external rewards can backfire. (E.g. Offer a child candy for making pretty drawings and whereas they used to draw nice for joy, now they will put pen down only because of reward). However intrinsic motivation can be imperiled even without offer reward. By focusing on ultimate goals of an activity we risk destroying our intrinsic motivation.

So, whether you are about start a diet, working out program or new course...at first of course visualize your goals to help get yourself started in the first place, but once you have begun, try to your goal fade a little into backgrounds. Revel in the process and you are more likely to make it to finishing lane. That way you are more likely master your course, lose weight, and get in shape. Make it happen.

What Is Your Take?
Have you found that focusing on your end goal help you or reduce your pleasure from what you do?

Who Is Our Competition?

Everything what we do in our lives we try to look at others and compare  and compete to them in way to improve. However it usually leads to disappointment, jealousy and it might end in anger.

Recently I was reading a story about one guy and how he was competing at his race. I found resemblance between him and myself. Why? Let me explain. A guy was suffering with some physical illness which was a barrier when he runs. Nobody understood why he was doing it, why he was racing when you cannot win. People could not understand his reason of doing it and suffering every time. You can imagine that it hurts every time when he stood up at starting line and tried to run. But there was one huge difference between him and others...

When everybody else is done with race, everyone comes back to with him. He is the only runner when he falls down; someone else will help pick him up. He is the only when he finishes, has hundreds of people running behind him. And this support gives him additional positive emotions which empower him to beat himself again and again and finally win race as well.

I felt in same way. Every time there were people in our team that were standing behind me, who were supporting to me and were trying to help me as much they could. They were great to me and appreciate what I was doing even my results were not the best. I am sure that you would like to know why they behaved in such a way.

And this is what I have realized. When you compete against everybody else, no one wants to help you. But when you compete against yourself, everyone wants to help you. People do not perceive you like a competitor, but more like a person who wants to overcome yourself which is usually more important reason than just race. And eventually if you are able beat yourself you can win race as well. There is always only one barrier, YOU. Overcome yourself and you will win I know that.

Now I know why I succeeded because I was competing against myself, every day. I was reminding during my day purpose why I came there to do it. I was not there to beat anyone but myself just like the guy who was running his race. And that is why I was always feeling full support of everybody  and never lost sight of that. We often lose sight why we do certain things just because we focus more on others (competition) than to ourself. 

Have always your own purpose (something meaningful) and people will help you get what you want.